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You will hurt your partner, of course, and the person may drop you right there.The first time I went out on a date after my husband fled our happy 21-year marriage was one of the worst hours of my life.If their husband was capable of such betrayal, how could they permit themselves to enter into another relationship that might leave them so vulnerable?You wouldn’t know the grief if you haven’t felt it.Try as I might, I couldn’t go through with it and before the waiter brought the soup, I made my apologies and fled back home.Women with whom I work who, like myself, believed themselves to be in a secure stable marriage often ask me how they could ever trust again.I’d met a guy online, a French guy (I live in Montreal) who, although quite a bit younger than me, seemed keen to get to know me.

The guy was trying so hard to engage me in conversation but all I could think, as I was tonelessly telling him the factoids of my life (I grew up here and went to school there, for example) was “” and a wretchedness washed over me, not to be shaken off.It’s not fair to anyone, we know, but it’s not our fault.If you want someone to blame, how about all the losers who made us this way?OR, you've been through all of that, and now you're stronger and classier than ever before.Whatever your specific sitch might be, we've got the song for you. (Side note: I'm considering opening up my own love advice column after this because damn, I'm wise AF.




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